I am reposting a blog from January 10, 2022, for two reasons. First, it is important and always timely. Second, I ask you to review and reflect on this blog before I present further details and “how to” in my next blog. Watch for the sequel coming next week titled, Dealing with the losses incurred from the sexual abuse of your…
The adverse factors are identified as we invest time and thought into our past and present. In this third video of a 3-part series, we explore and examine our lives’ hidden aspects and past trauma(s), which also give birth to adverse factors.
As we explore the scripts and scenes from our childhood home, we discover that they often expose adverse factors that we potentially adopt in our lives and carry forward into our marriages.
My primary work in fulfilling the mission of Marriage Reconstruction Ministries is with the husbands of sexual abuse survivors. Husbands contact me because their wives are experiencing disturbing effects that are disrupting their marriage. The effects can include shame, eating disorders, sexual intimacy struggles, relational conflict, depression, anxiety disorder, and more. These effects can distort perceptions, disrupt routines, and damage…
This video series will help you to understand why survivors are silenced, how disclosures have distinct characteristics, and how we can respond with compassion.
I wrote in a previous blog, “a reconstructed and healthy marriage is not the experience for all couples whose marriage is affected by childhood sexual abuse (CSA). Sometimes reconstruction is no longer viewed as a possibility” (What about the marriages that seem beyond reconstruction?). This blog is for those contemplating separation or divorce. It is an invitation to take inventory…
Survivors of childhood sexual abuse and their spouses are familiar with loss. Survivors of sexual abuse can experience the loss of: Safety and security Trust Sense of innocence Intimacy Physical health Emotional health And more . . . Spouses of sexual abuse survivors can experience loss of intimacy, a sense of normalcy in life, emotional connection, and more. These losses…
“My marriage and my wife are not what I expected.” Though many wives can speak these same words regarding their husbands, this blog is addressed to husbands. As a husband and visitor to this website, you might be thinking, “The effects of my wife’s childhood sexual abuse have changed my expectations for our marriage.” Unfulfilled expectations in marriage beg the…
I’ve recently been diagnosed with cancer. Though it was unexpected and obviously uninvited, I’ve been journaling many valuable lessons and embracing some new perspectives. Because of my work in Marriage Reconstruction Ministries, I began noticing parallels between a diagnosis of cancer and being a survivor of childhood sexual abuse. In this article I hope to specifically highlight three vital truths…